Sam: My dad always said there were two ways to get a girl to love you: take her hunting, and rock n roll.

I didn't kiss Finn, Sam. I saved his life.


Will, you have more grease in your hair than the guy behind Wikileaks?


I'm committing Sue-icide.

Sue's journal

These costumes are causing some unmentionable chafing.


Holy Sweet Hell! They're fooling around! I KNOW what cheating looks like, I do it all the time.


Screw her. She put me on the bottom of the pyramid.


The only job you are going to have is working on a pole!

Rachel [to Santana]

Tina [to Santana]: Five minutes ago, you said Mr.Schu belonged in a 12 step program.
Will: Wait, what?
Santana: You're addicted to vests.

I’ve had mono so many times I’ve turned into stereo.


Will Schuester: Ok, guys I've got one word for you.
Brittany: Is it Love? I'm totally going to graduate now!

Finn: There's nothing going on between me and Rachel.
Quinn: All I know is that when I don't catch you staring at me... you're staring at her.

Glee Season 2 Quotes

May I have this dance?


They look like deep fried deep poop.

Brittany [on tater tots]