Favorite Happy Endings Quotes
Wait so Dave's new mom is Penny's old mom?
Alex
Drunk Jane loves a good cleaning.
Jane
What's wrong? Did you push the Qtip in too far again?
Penny [to Max]
Brad: Dude I need your help.
Max: Alright but it's gonna cost you.
Brad: You owe me eight thousand dollars.
If I don't show up with a sack of clams I'm gonna look like a real dope!
Dave
He was threatening to blow up this whole operation so I had to go ghost prots on him.
Max [about Dave]
Check it out, the trash can stove. Or as I call it, the "trove."
Max
If we didn't want to get caught, we'd have sex at home.
Jane
When I went out with that male nurse, I found out that I still have a soft spot for dating gay guys.
Penny
Tampa is not a place you go it's a place you end up.
Dave
To be fair, I'm their real uncle. Blood is thicker than annoying.
Max [to Penny]
Dammit Chad, you got me in trouble again. That's my underwear monster, I believe you two have met.
Max
