Narrator: And friends, that's when Mateo said his first word.
Mateo: Dada.
Narrator: Unfortunately, he said it to the wrong man.

God doesn't need to see boobies as you enter the Holy Sacrament of Marriage.


Michael: Don't "what list" me. I know there's a list of instructions you're dying to send me. Just email them to me. I want to do this right. The more detailed, the better.
Jane: You're really turning me on right now.

Be gone, you dirty old Devil!


It doesn't matter where we live because wherever you are is home to me.


Petra: After everything Jane's done, starting with having Mateo in the first place after your sister knocked her up, and you can't tolerate a small commute to let her live in her dream house? Get over yourself, Rafael, and find a way to make it work!
Narrator: And so, just as Jesus rose Lazarus from the dead, Petra Solano went to the mat for Jane Villaneuva on this day in the year of our Lord, 2016.

Every time God closes a door, he opens up the opportunity for a much bigger wedding venue.


There is no curse. I think perhaps you're just frightened because of the intensity of our passion.


I thought it'd be good to have a bonding night. Just us as a family.


I'm sorry you don't like me, but you know what, your son understands why I wasn't here, so I'm cool, and I really hope that you'll learn to live with me because I'm not going anywhere.

Enough! This is not some other guy's kid. This is Mateo, and I love him, and I love Jane way too much to be putting up with this disrespect.


Jane: If he doesn't respond, then there's something definitely wrong.
Narrator: Something is definitely wrong. God, this is frustrating.

Jane the Virgin Season 2 Quotes

I'll say this, the girl's got spunk.


Rafael: Wait, what? You just gave birth.
Jane: Yeah, exactly. I'm his mother, and I have to feed him in 92 minutes, so I'm not just going to sit here and wait. I'm going. End of story. I'm just going to need a hand out of bed. Grab those wipes, and grab that burp cloth. Oh, and I need pants. Hey, can you grab me that bag of, um, adult diapers. Alright, let's go!