Marry Me
Tuesdays 9:00 PM on NBCMarry Me Quotes
Liam: (To Gil) You are a complete muppet!
Dennah: Hey, nobody talks to Gil that way but us… and his ex wife… his parents… and neighbors… and the occasional barista, but the point is shut up!
Jake: Babe, I know it looks bad, but I am not unlocking my drawer so our friends can just riffle through my stuff. It's private. Weren't you embarrassed when Gil went through your night stand?
Annie: Of course I was. He found dilda radner.
Jake: I still think you should of called it dildo baggins.
Annie: Gilda's my hero.
Annie: You were going to go your whole life avoiding soy just to keep the proposal a surprise?
Jake: Well I love my edamame, but I love my Anniemame more. Ha! Anybody? No. Come on that was gold. God, tough storage room.
Annie: Wait Gil, you're a doomsday prepper?
Gil: We prefer survivalistas.
Annie: And despite this minor power outage resulting in little more than...
Jake: ...You eating out of the trash like a raccoon.
Annie: Well they are highly intelligent animals with opposable thumbs, so I take that as a compliment.
Not to mention tonight has gone off without a curse... hitch.
Jake
Jake: Wow babe, you are just like Oprah. You don't have any kids of your own, but you tell everybody else what to do with theirs.
Annie: Awe, you should put that in your vows.
Jake: That was impressive. How'd you know that would work?
Annie: I don't know, I just kinda felt it. When you said he loved me, I realized there was nothing more powerful than withholding love.
Jake: Awe, you are going to make a great mom.
Do we some how just back into kidnapping this kid? I hope he doesn't have any Liam Neeson types in his family.
Jake
Jake: Perfect costume Julie [dressed as a bumble bee]. You know, Annie and I are always talking about how you're such a "b".
Julie: Well I heard...
Jake: [interrupting] No no no no, you're an exceptional "b".
Julie: Okay get it. I got it the first time.
Jake: You're a straight up "b".
Annie: Some of my favorite [Halloween] memories were from when I was little and my dads did their haunted house. All the neighbors said it was as scary as it was gay.
Jake: That seems like a pretty intolerant neighborhood.
Annie: Yeah, we had to move shortly thereafter.
Julie: So we're having a planning/mandatory safety meeting, and I'm required by law to invite every tenant, regardless of their inappropriate sex volume.
Jake: I'm a screamer, what can I say.
Julie: Oh, I was referring to Diane in 6B, but good for you Jake.
