McGee: What are you doing?
Anthony DiNozzo Senior: Changing the subject!
Anthony DiNozzo Senior: I was hoping you would have some words of wisdom?
He was a Marine. [Gibbs stares at him meaningfully.] ...And always will be.Torres
I love animals, but I think I'd love my husband more.Abby
Abby: Gibbs, I can't have a conversation by myself!
Gibbs: It's never stopped you before.
McGee: How do you sleep at night?!
Torres: On my back. Naked.
Detective Campbell: I invited NCIS here as a courtesy.
Gibbs: How about as a courtesy, I don't kick your ass!
Bishop: Technology tantrum.
Torres: Joining my club, McGee?
You're why others are alive. No phone call killed your friend.Gibbs
Suspect [McGee is playing Bad Cop]: Get him off me!
Torres: I would, but he's scaring *me*!
I don't kick down doors. Are you saying I'm not a crime fighter?Abby
McGee: Office equipment is your friend.
Torres: It's a bad friend, the one you lend money to and never pays you back!