New Girl
Tuesdays 8:30 PM on FOXNew Girl Season 1 Quotes
He's so soft, like a towel.
Jess
No teeth! You can't use prop teeth!
Nick
Schmidt: We don't want to be mean, we just don't want you to be yourself...in any way.
Jess: Okay. Suppress the Jess. Got it.
I really just want to get in there and ush this wedding in the face!
Winston
Schmidt: Who let the dirty slut out of the slut house?
Jess [in a British accent]: Probably the slut butler, right!
So when I do the chicken dance I do it a little differently. Instead of doing claps, I like to do a peck. It's more realistic.
Jess
Jess: $550 for the TV?! Seems a little steep. I'm gonna write down a figure, and this is as high as I'll go.
Pawnshop dude: You drew a smiley face.
Rochelle? Fancy name. 'Rochelle', like a mermaid.
Jess
No! I can't call Spencer I haven't talked to him since he cheated on me with that ho! Actually, that's not fair. She might be a really nice ho.
Jess
Jess, you know what, I'll let you check my lost and found...got sizes zero through ten.
Schmidt
Jess: So Coach said they used to play basketball in college, but then Winston went pro?
Schmidt: In Latvia, okay? He went pro in Latvia. It's a big difference. The team logo is a fig. Just one single fig!
Jess (about Winston, the new roommate): I'm so excited to meet him!
Nick: No Jess, he's sleeping. He flew in late last night, we took him straight to the bar, took a bunch of shots, got drunk, screamed I love America.Now he's happily passed out.