Night Court
Tuesdays 8:00 PM on NBCNight Court Season 1 Episode 4: "Dan Vs. Dating" Quotes
Abby: Am I crazy or has someone been getting a lot of lady attention lately?
Gurgs: Connie from Probate won’t stop talking about the dashing new defense attorney with thick hair and a tush worth a push. Connie’s a big ol’ freak!
I hate to spoil all your fun, but my dating dates are behind me. Course there was a time I would’ve killed for this kind of attention. And almost did. Not a human, a chicken. A voodoo doctor back in Plaquemines Parish, Louisiana, told me that an animal sacrifice would make me irresistible to the fairer sex. Anyway, let’s get back to these weirdos.
Abby: Which one of these pet fish looks like the most fun? This one has kind eyes and seems like a good listener, but this one’s name is Zazzle.
Dan: Unless you’re a seal, getting a fish is a desperate cry for help.
Is there no poetry left in flirting? Earlier today, a woman yelled, ‘I’d like to climb that!’
Dan: My heart is closed for business. I’ve had the great romance of my life. That’s more than most people get.
Abby: I know you don’t believe that. I mean, just tonight, you said that we’re all entitled to more than one great love. Sure, you were defending a polygamist cult leader, I could tell it was from the heart.
It’s fine. I’m just going to work in the morgue. The vibe is lousy but at least there are plenty of drawers.
Olivia
I’ve never been a fan of soup. It’s sort of like hot juice.
Dan: Do you like rain sticks?
Julianne: How about we move to a different room with a different stick?
I was going to steal your identity and leave you a shell of a man, but you can’t burn a house down twice. Believe me, I’ve tried.
Julianne
