Resident Alien Season 1 Episode 1: "Pilot" Quotes
Spring. The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, the sun warms the earth. Somewhere; not here. It's 30 degrees out, it snowed nine feet last winter, and four frozen sodas just exploded in my truck. Welcome to Patience, Colorado.Harry
Sheriff: I'm Sheriff Mike Thompson. Everybody calls me Big Black.
Harry: Because of your truck.
Sheriff: Because of my... [chuckles] Oh, you funny, huh? Funny.
To say my species is more advanced than humans would be a massive understatement. If the universe had a scale for intelligence, humans would land right below lizards.Harry
Ben: Thanks for getting him, Mike.
Sheriff: I told you to call me Big Black.
Ben: Yeah, I'm, I'm not comfortable with that.
Harry: This. Is. Awesome!
Asta: What? What's awesome?
Harry: A good mystery. Figuring out what happened. Like Law & Order. Kung kung! That was fun.
Harry: Yeah. I know who killed him.
Harry: He did. The angle of the wounds. The way the blood is on his hand. He murdered himself.
Sheriff: And why the hell would he do that?
Harry: I don't know. I wasn't here. [walks away]
Sheriff: Aight, look. That's one creepy son of a bitch, right? That ain't just me, right? Ya'll see that, right?
Ben: Hey, please don't tell me that you're leaving.
Harry: OK. I won't.
Ben: Wh, um, well, but we, we still need your help.
Harry: I was asked to come look at a dead body. I did that. Do you have more dead bodies?
Harry: Then. I have to go.
Asta: You OK to drive home? Or you gonna daaance home?
Harry: That would be fun. But impractical.
Whiskey. Headache. Nausea. Severe dehydration. Alcohol must not affect humans the way it does us. If it did, they obviously would never drink it.Harry
[searching his phone] Douche. Bag. A small syringe for douching the "vageena." Images. [shakes his head] WHAT THE HELL?? [searching again] Taint. [tosses the phone across the cab in shock]Harry
Asta: I've always been an outsider. Maybe that's why I understand you.
Harry: What makes you think I'm an outsider?
Asta: Because wherever you learned to do that stuff back there, it wasn't around here. You're just different. I know what that feels like. Sometimes just feeling human is alien to me.
Harry: Yeah, me too.