Scrubs Season 2 Episode 15: "His Story" Quotes
J.D.: Ahhh, eight strips of bacon! That girl is all about the J.Dizzle.
Turk: Oh, yeah?
J.D.: Oh, my God, it's pancake man.
Turk: That's what I'm talkin' 'bout.
Dr. Cox: What is it, there, Bobbo.
Dr. Kelso: I'm sorry.
Dr. Cox: What did you say?
Dr. Kelso: I spoke to my cardiologist, and he said if you hadn't caught my high blood-pressure, and it had continued unchecked, it, uh, might have resulted in a mild case of... death.
Elliot: Nurse, I need... clean sheets right away to room one... thousand.
Paul: Uh, she's covering because she's embarrassed that she likes a nurse. And I really can't figure out why.
Dr. Kelso: Well, that's because you're doing a woman's job, son. Have a good one.
Elliot: Great. Why did you do that?
Paul: You know, Elliot, what I do for a living, it doesn't make me feel like I'm any less of a man. Neither does my love of baking... or gardening... or the fact that I occasionally menstruate.
Dr. Cox: Boy, I gotta say, your wife is hotter than I ever imagined. Arrrrrrrrrrr... me-ow!
Dr. Gross: Hello, Perry. You're obviously trying to bully me, but you can't bully me because I don't fear you. Now, I'm leaving.
Dr. Cox: Kelso asked me to give him a physical, I did it, he said "thank you" and told me he owed me one.
Dr. Gross: You actually made a decision that benefited your life personally and professionally?
Dr. Cox: Well, a resident kinda talked me into it.
Dr. Gross: Yeah, come on, you're telling me that you took the advice of another human being? This is a great moment for me.
Dr. Cox: Congratulations.
Jenny: Are you talking to your chili dog!?
Turk: What? Hey! Uh, yeah, well, I find that they don't repeat on me as much if I'm real friendly to 'em.
Jenny: What?
Turk: Nothing, it's just-it's just weird seeing you out in the real world, you know, I feel kind of guilty. 'Cause you're so nice to me and my buddy, and we've never even had a real conversation. Instead, we act like school kids and argue over who we think you got a crush on.
Jenny: Oh, it's totally you.
Turk: Wha-?
Jenny: Vanilla over chocolate? Please.
Janitor: How you doing.
J.D.: Did you just climb down an elevator shaft to torment me?
Janitor: Well, sometimes in life you gotta do what you gotta do.
Elliot: Paul. I know that I've been acting like an insecure idiot, but... if you'll forgive me, I'd love to take you for dinner tonight.
Paul: Screw that. I'll cook for you. I've only got one apron, though, so bring your own if you want to wear one.
