Scrubs Season 4 Quotes
Janitor: Ah! I wanna see that engagement ring.
Jeweler: That costs ten thousand dollars.
Janitor: I got twelve bucks.
Murray: He's not my dad, he's my fake dad. Which means what my fake cousin Samantha and I almost did in the tenth grade would have been beautiful... and right.
J.D.: Been there with my gram-gram...
J.D.'s Narration: Maybe I got too involved with Murray and his fake real dad. But as I watched Gregory serenade a clearly uncomfortable Murray, I realized something. If Murray could look past his dad's imperfections and appreciate all the time he'd given him, maybe I owe Dr. Cox a thank-you for the same thing.
J.D.: Hey. I just wanted to take a second to thank you for constantly berating me, doubting my abilities, and the overall devastation of my self-esteem.
Dr. Cox: My pleasure.
Murray: Look you obviously have some issues with your own father that you're projecting onto me so why don't you go ahead and give him a jingle?
J.D.: He's dead.
Murray: Good stuff!
J.D.: No I'm serious.
Murray: Classic!
J.D.: He had like a massive heart attack.
Murray: I'm sorry for your loss.
J.D.'s narration: Make the flesh and blood argument again but in a different way.
J.D.: Blood and flesh, Murray.
Murray: I'll do it.
J.D.'s narration: Jackpot!
J.D.'s Narration: Life in a hospital is never boring.
Carla: What the hell are you guys doing?
Turk: Practicing our slow motion run.
J.D.: Makes everything seem more dramatic.
Carla: You're doctors. Doctors.
Turk: Baby?
J.D.: Go get her, Turk!
Turk: Waaaaaaiiiiit!
J.D.: Oh, he's slow.
Elliot: Do you have chocolate cake today?
Cafeteria Worker: Nope.
Elliot: Oh. Isn't that just the pickle on the giant crap sandwich that is my day!
Elliot: Oh my God, I am so sorry. I'm just having the worst day.
Turk: It's no biggie. Forgive and forget, right?... (to cross): Please get her.
Elliot: I have been kicking ass lately, but this place is such a boys' club I still can't even get x-rays or lab tests back on time.
Carla: Hey, Elliot, if you're desperate to get things done, you could always do what Jordan does.
Jordan: Could you move my car out of the sun? If the seat gets too hot, my thighs get all pink and sweaty.
The guy grabs the keys and takes off in a flash.
Jordan: Yeah. Bye-bye, security guard.
Elliot: Hm. Very classy.
Jordan: Don't judge me, stick. You do what you have to do to level the playing field.
Elliot: Well, Carla and I would never behave that way.
Carla: Thank you.
Elliot: How'd you get chocolate cake? He said they didn't have any!
Carla: Oh. I just did like this (thrusts cleavage) and said, "Got cake?"
J.D.: Anyway, know Mr. Marks? He said he doesn't have any family to be a kidney donor? But he's got a son! We gotta find this guy!
Dr. Cox: Look, Newbie, there are times a man wants to keep something to himself. Like, say, he's got a son. Or he's 29-years-old and keeps a journal with a unicorn drawn on the cover?
J.D.: Ah, that's a horse with a sword on his head, and he's there to guard my hopes and dreams.
Dr. Cox: Yeah, yeah. Look, Claudia: Just promise me you won't get too involved with your patient. Okay?
J.D.'s Narration: After getting more involved, I found out Mr. Marks's son was an air-traffic controller at a small private airport.
