South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Season 14 Quotes
Kyle: I could really use a friend right now.
Stan: Okay dude, I'm here for you.
Kyle: Okay, then get on Facebook and fertilize my crops.
Stan: Are you doing that stupid Facebook stuff again?
Cartman: Stupid Facebook stuff...
Stan: Why are you guys in here wasting your time? We're supposed out playing video games.
Does a bear crap in the woods and does the Pope crap on the dreams of 200 deaf boys?
Cartman
I want you to look at me when we make love, and not just my balls.
Randy
Is that something I'd want to do? Is the Pope Catholic and making the world safe for pedophiles?
Cartman
Look, I'm telling you guys, it's awesome. I can have all the pot I want. I get around faster than walking and wherever I need a seat, I can just sit on my balls.
Randy
You cutting the Colonel's gravy with Boston Market to try and save yourself some %@#%ing money!?
Cartman
Do I want to do it? Does the pope help pedophiles get away with their crimes?
Cartman
Stan: Mom says to stop trying to give yourself cancer.
Randy: Just gonna get a little bit of cancer, Stan, tell mom it's okay.
Cartman: You were sleep walking again and dressed Sarah Jessica Parker in a moose suit and you left her in the forest and she got shot by a hunter.
Butters: What? Oh no.
Cartman: You're gonna have to come down and admit it was you.
Butters: I got her killed too? Owell, at least she was ugly.
Mr. Stotch: Butters, away from the window, you're being grounded.
Butters: Sorry dad. I was just being the voice of a generation.
And Matthew, how come a transvestite donkey witch is standing next to you and wearing a dress?
Reporter [to Matthew Broderick about Sarah Jessica Parker]
