Roman: I've been down in the salt mines so long with my fellow Johnny lunchpails, I no longer speak 1%.
Shiv: Rome, you were slinging candy apples not diggin' the Panama Canal.
Roman: I've seen the world for how it really is, Shioban, and it has changed me. I'm a kettle corn shoveler here to show you frilly clit flickers the truth.

Logan: Rhea and I will handle the big picture.
Shiv: Remind me again. Does Rhea work for the company?
Kendall: Remind us. Do you?

Gerri: Shit before the shovel.
Roman: Allow me to be the shit.

Logan: Everybody smile.
Roman: I am smiling.
Shiv: Yeah, not like a fuckin' pervert.

Penis cat.


Nan: You do have an interesting family.
Logan: Yeah, I apologize for the lateness of my son.
Nan: Well.
Logan: He's been volunteering.
Nan: Really? That's impressive. He has the time even in the teeth of a takeover battle?
Marcia: He's very capable.
Logan: A lot of bandwidth.
Nan: Oh, its wonderful to have such band width. After everything.

Mark: Yeah, I'm actually getting my second Ph.D. right now in Africana Studies from Brown.
Tom: Wow. So you're going to be a double doctor?
Mark: The second Ph.D.'s much harder. Yeah, five years is an absolute gauntlet.
Shiv: Oh, I'm sure. But just think, you know, once you're done, you won't have to waste the 12 seconds it takes to look up something on Wikipedia. No, but seriously though, it's quite an achievement.

Logan: What the fuck did you say to Mark? Making quacks about his Ph.D.?
Shiv: It was a joke. He laughed.
Frank: It seems he did not enjoy that.
Logan: He's a yes, Shiv. He's solid. Why are you even botherin' with him?

Romulus, when you laugh, please do it in the same volume as everyone else. We didn't get you from a hyena farm.


Maximum: Well, you can't change Washington without knowing Washington. Can you name me one member of the House Congress Committee?
Connor: Oh, uh, yeah. I think I know one. Representative Ferdinand D. Who Gives a Shit from the great state of No One Fucking Cares.
Maxim: Well, I'm convinced. Clear some space on Mount Rushmore folks!

Money is a virtual construct whereas integrity, virtue -- these things actually exist.


Shiv: This is what happens. You're given the keys to the castle and then you get paralyzed staring into the eyes of the cobra.
Tom: They're riding me pretty hard in there. Do you think I should fight back more?
Shiv: You know, then? He smells the vacillation and then he's got you. You're done. He's juicing another lemon.
Tom: Wouldn't it be nice if you stopped beating up on me, too?
Shiv: What?
Tom: Maybe you could stop beating up on me, too?
Shiv: What? That's just nothing. That's silly. Well, no one cares.
Tom: Well, technically, I care. I care.
Shiv: Sometimes you say stupid things. He's got me second-guessing myself. I'm wavering on landing the best strategy for a deal that I don't even like. I really want this.
Tom: I know.
Shiv: Really, I want to be sitting at that table.
Tom: Hey, hey, listen to me. You are sitting at the table. You are.

Succession Season 2 Episode 5 Quotes

Logan: Greg!
Greg: Hey! GregorY!
Logan: Have a drink. Have a drink you beautiful Ichabod Crane fuck you.

Romulus, when you laugh, please do it in the same volume as everyone else. We didn't get you from a hyena farm.