The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSThe Big Bang Theory Season 4 Quotes
Penny: Ooh I thought I smelled pizza.
Sheldon: That's remarkable. If pepperoni were an explosive substance, you could replace German Shepherds at our nation's airports.
Granted, Penny, your secondary sexual characteristics are reasonably bodacious, but Priya is highly educated, she's an accomplished professional, and she comes from the culture that literally wrote the book on neat ways to have sex. Whereas you on the other hand are a community college dropout who comes from the culture that wrote the book on tipping cows.
Amy
You don't have to be strong for me. Now let's talk about Priya that man stealing bitch.
Amy
At this point in our ecosystem you are akin to the Plover, a small scavenging bird that eats the food from between the teeth of crocodiles. Please, fly into our open maw and have at it.
Sheldon
If you're experiencing any tension or awkwardness, it may stem from the fact that Leonard and Penny used to, if I may quote Howard, do the dance with no pants.
Sheldon
The Hindu code of Manu was very clear in these matters. If the woman's father is not around, the duty of controlling her base desires falls to the closest male member of her family, in this case Raj. The code also states that if she disobeys, she will be reborn in the womb of a jackal and tormented by diseases. If true, that seems like an awfully large gamble, given that the prize is Leonard.
Sheldon
Just keep in mind should you ever need a slightly apathetic, tertiary friend, I stand at the ready.
Sheldon
While you're at it I am upset we have an unannounced houseguest, so make me cocoa.
Sheldon
Leonard: Still arguing which is the best CSI?
Howard: We agreed they all have their merits.
Howard: I'm not having this conversation with you Ma!
Howard's Ma: God forbid you get one of those new fancy sex diseases!
Bernadette: I think the woman can manage to put a wig on by herself.
Howard: It's not just the wig, it's pinning her hair up, it's putting on her eyebrows...it's a two person job.
Sheldon: She stiffed you?
Penny: I believe that's what he did to her.