The Good Place
Thursdays 9:00 PM on NBCThe Good Place Quotes
I wanted that mom! I wanted the mom who made me afternoon snacks instead of telling me to look for loose fries in the McDonald's ball pit. Why does Patricia get that mom? If Donna Shellstrop has truly changed, that means she was always capable of change but I just wasn't worth changing for.
Eleanor
Young lady, you will stop this nonsense, go to the PTA meeting, and support your mother. I won't hear another word about it!
Michael
I know I haven't been the best father in the world. I might not have even been in the top five. I wanna make up for that. I'll distract them, you run out the back.
Donkey Doug
The Donkey Doug who was banned from Disney World for biting Buzz Lightyear?
Tahani
So the thing is, one of your parents is not technically, actually, dead.
Janet
Chidi: Here's the truth: You're amazing. And my feelings have changed. I wish I could tell you why, I really, really do. But, I can't.
Michael: As soon as you learned about the afterlife your motivation to be good was corrupted, so you can't earn points anymore. So sorry for eternally dooming you.
Janet: And that's our bad guys.
That's insane. But it's also like the eleventh most insane thing to happen today so who cares.
Eleanor
The world is empty. There is no point to anything and you're just gonna die. So do whatever!
Chidi
See ya in hell. You know what I just realized? I always say that when leaving a room, but right now it's accurate. I will literally see you in hell.
Eleanor
I'm really good at telemarketing. I can usually guess how long to microwave food without looking at the box. I'd say those are my two main skills.
Eleanor
I'm not mad. I'm actually laughing because this whole study was a hilarious, stupid, pointless joke. And now it's over, so let's hit the road. I don't need you guys. You don't need me.
Eleanor
