You win some, you lose some. Except for me. I always win.

Kai

I don't care. Life's too short. Immortal or not, I don't wanna waste another minute.

Elena

Just get on with it Kai. Listening to you talk makes me want to die.

Liz [to Kai]

I could kiss you right now you beautiful moron.

Damon [to Tyler]

I was trying to fix something that I had no business trying to fix. It's like textbook definition of a control freak from hell.

Caroline

Caroline: If you can't fix a coffee machine, how are you able to fix people?
Stefan: Sure you don't need some real food? There's probably a machine around here that vends O-positive.

Cheating? Cheating is erasing all of our epic memories. That's cheating.

Damon

So now I have a Stage 10 cancer patient, which by the way doesn't exist, who is beyond terminally ill, and a vampire, meaning all of his emotions are heightened and he can't die.

Jo

Well I'm no doctor, but this guy is screwed.

Damon

Why are we talking about spending spring break anywhere other than this tiny bed.

Liv