You know, Jack, I lost my brother, too. And it feels like you can't get air in your lungs, like nothing will be okay again, like you'll never feel joy again. So you try to push it down, you try not to feel it, and the awful irony is that, the more you push it down, the longer it stays. So you have to let it out, to cry, to laugh, and to cry again, which is all the same thing, by the way, crying, and laughing, and screaming and dancing, it lets it out of your body, and you need it out of your body because when it comes out, it leaves room for light to come in.

Carina