Better Off Ted Quotes

Jerome [tasting meat made in lab]: It tastes familiar. Ted: Beef? Jerome: No. Linda: Chicken? We’ll take chicken. Ted: What does it taste…

Phil: I am the Below Zero Hero. Julie in Employee Services asked for my autograph. That’s right, Julie. With those breasts in front. It’s…

Veronica: Legal is worried that Phil might think his annoying outbursts are connected to our allegedly freezing him. Ted: We didn’t…

Phil: Blobby, like Bobby, only with an l Lem: Don’t name it or you won’t want to eat it. Remember Chester the carrot? Phil: Yeah, I miss…

Ted: At least meat grown in a test tube doesn’t feel pain. Please tell me it doesn’t feel pain. Lem: We don’t think so. Phil: Yeah,…

Veronica: We have a problem. The Food Division just told me that the “Extra Fun Mac and Cheese” I’m supposed to be presenting to the…

Veronica: Ted. Ted: Veronica. Veronica: How are you? Ted: I’m fine. Why? Veronica: I was just seeing what small talk might look like….

Narrator: Veridian Dynamics. We’re the future of food, developing the next generation of food and food-like products. Tomatoes… the…

Veronica: Did I surprise you? I didn’t mean to surprise you. I’m just a friendly person. Linda: I didn’t think you know my name….

Ted: Listen, Veronica, about firing Phil, I don’t think we should rush into anything. Veronica: You’re right. Wait until the end of…