Californication Quotes

Karen: Yeah, so, Marilyn Manson is trying to get your daughter and I into a threesome right now.

Karen: You’re making some questionable choices right now. Becca: Says the queen of questionable choices.

Hank: Sometimes it’s important to lie to children.

Faith: I think you might be more trouble than you look.

Atticus: Masturbation is for the poor, the downtrodden, the silent unf-ckables.

Becca: Do you guys mind if I crash here, do some writing? Maybe have a few people over? Charlie: Whatever you need. I got alcohol, I got…

Charlie: I never was the p-ssy eater you were. Stu: You should have thought about it Charlie. Compensate for your sh-tty hang time and…

Hank: Why are you living beyond your means? Charlie: It’s the only way I know how.

Hank: How’d it go buddy boy? Charlie: I’m sitting in the dark in my underwear Hank, day drinkin’. Hank: Got it.

Ken: How was the party last night? Charlie: Ah well, guys in black leather, the smell of moist ass hair. What’s not to like?