Californication Quotes

Eddie: You got me? Hank: No, you represent everything I hate, but I do find you highly entertaining, continue please.

Hank: I’m holding out for Keitel. When in doubt call, in the Bad Lieutenant. Plus the guy loves to show his dong. Gotta love that in a…

Hank: It doesn’t have to be this hard Becca Becca: Shouldn’t it be hard? I mean isn’t that pretty much what happens after the final…

Hank: Comparing me to the world’s most infamous fan of underage girls is not the way to start a pep talk Charlie. Charlie: Are you…

Marci: I’m too old to sustain life. Too bitter too. Sperm would enter my pretty little vajuju and my cold black heart would kill that…

Abby: I’m obviously far too old for you. Hank: No see that’s where you’re wrong, I like me a mature woman. Gross feet, stretch marks,…

Marci: Fuck you, you fucking pedophile what’s so gross about fucking me?

Hank: No Charlie you look good. Like a baby. Like a big sexy baby. Charlie: Thank you.

Charlie: Nice cock by the way, very manly. Hank: This old thing?

Hank: I refuse to be number twelve Charlie. Charlie: Oh I wasn’t counting the guys.