Two and a Half Men Season 4

"Prostitutes and Gelato"

Evelyn gets a new boyfriend, Teddy, who bonds with Charlie and Alan over a trip to Vegas. The boys confront their feelings about their mother's dating.

"Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-lookin"

Charlie is shocked when the young handyman working on his house beats him out for Chloe. Alan has no sympathy for him.

"Mr. McGlue's Feedbag"

Alan asks Charlie to help Jake with his book report so that he can go to the DMV. Charlie ends up taking Jake to the race track while Alan gets conned at the DMV.

"Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous"

Alan and Charlie re-examined their sexuality after Alan becomes friends with Greg, a homosexual. Jake has a crush on Greg's daughter.

"Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot"

Alan looks forward to Judith's wedding while Charlie and Myra continue their relationship.

"Smooth as a Ken Doll"

Alan is thrilled to give Judith his last alimony check; Charlie takes Herb's sister, Myra, out for a date and they bond over their hatred of Judith

"It Never Rains in Hooterville"

Alan tries to bond with Jake when he realizes his acting career is over; Kandi pursues an acting career

"I Merely Slept With a Commie"

After Evelyn confides in Alan and Charlie about how she doesn't want to die like her friend no loved ones at her funeral, the boys convince her this could be her one day.

"Young People Have Phlegm Too"

Charlie's young, hot girlfriend takes him to a new club. Charlie takes Alan with him and they're shocked to learn they're considered old.

"My Damn Stalker"

Rose is moving to London and Charlie is surprised by his reaction to the news; Alan lies to a woman he met online

"That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami"

Charlie sets up Alan with the new neighbor Danielle but gets jealous when the two bond

"Don't Worry, Speed Racer"

When Jake tells Charlie and Alan he heard his mother having sex with Herb, it conjures up a repressed memory of Charlie's and he seeks help from Rose

"Castrating Sheep in Montana"

Berta discovers that Alan has been secretly dating her daughter, Naomi.

"Walnuts and Demerol"

Charlie's friends and family interrupt his Christmas date. When Evelyn finds out who the date is, she tries to push them apart.

"Kissing Abraham Lincoln"

Fearing he'll get rid of one of them, Berta and Lydia fight to stay; Kandi tries to stop Alan from selling their condo.

"Corey's Been Dead For an Hour"

Charlie reaches the breaking point with putting up with Alan's mooching during a double date; Jake is left home alone for the first time

"Release the Dogs"

Alan suffers from insomnia and visits his psychiatrist that tells him it's due to his jealous towards Charlie

"Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head"

Berta's daughter is pregnant and Berta drags Charlie with her to confront the baby daddy; Alan shows his fetish for pregnant women while they're gone

"Apologies for the Frivolity"

Charlie is dating a woman whose personality and life are similar Evelyn's, his mother

"A Live Woman of Proven Fertility"

Alan is excited by the prospect of Judith remarrying and ending his alimony payments. Alan gets Charlie to help him when he thinks the marriage might not go through because of Jake disliking her fiance.

"A Pot Smoking Monkey"

Alan tries to hire his ex-lawyer to help him win custody of his dog from Kandi

"The Sea is a Harsh Mistress"

Charlie tries to surf to impress Dottie, but nearly drowns when he thinks he sees his dead father

"Who's Vod Kanockers?"

Charlie tells Alan why he didn't marry Mia; Charlie and Alan deal with their noisy neighbor, Steven Tyler

"Working for Caligula"

With Alan out of the house, Charlie returns to his bachelor lifestyle until Alan returns, having been divorced from Kandi already.

Two and a Half Men
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Two and a Half Men Season 4 Quotes

Jake: Even though Mom stopped loving you and Kandi stopped loving you, you don't have to worry about me.
Alan: Thanks, pal!
Jake: You're my dad. I pretty much gotta love you.

Alan: Listen, I-- I really need to talk to you. Can you come downstairs?
Charlie: Sure. Give me... an hour and a half.
Alan: An hour and a half?
Charlie: I know it's a little rushed, but we're on a tight schedule here! Tina's got homework, Cindy's got to meet her fiancé, and Marie... well, Marie's on the clock.
Alan: You already had two women in bed and you felt the need to call a professional?
Charlie: Better safe than sorry.