Milhouse Van Houten is Bart's best friend on The Simpsons.  Milhouse is voiced by Pamela Hayden is a nerd that isn't nearly as smart as he looks.  His parents are now divroced and he's always had a crush on Lisa.

Milhouse Van Houten Quotes

Mr. Burns: Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital who wants you to win this game. I know because I crippled him myself to inspire you.
Milhouse: (to his mom and dad) I hope they win, or Mr. Burns said he's coming back.

How could Mrs. Krabappel take my cell phone? I'm only on month one of a sixty month plan

Milhouse

The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Mr. Burns: Oh, and one more thing: you must find the jade monkey before the next full moon.
Smithers Actually sir, we found the jade monkey. It was in your glove compartment.
Mr. Burns: And the road maps, and ice scraper?
Smithers: They were in there too, sir.
Mr. Burns: Excellent! It's all falling into place...