Charlie: Listen, Janine. Thanks for everything, but I should probably get this little guy home and come back. It's way past his bedtime. Jake: What are you talking about? It's not past my bedtime. Charlie: What do you wanna bet he falls asleep in the car and I have to carry him in? Jake: What do you wanna bet he has to go home and take a laxative because he's too old to poop normal?
(After Janine goes into the kitchen) Charlie: You don't know who you're messing with. Jake: (yelling loudly) Are you kidding? I think she's gorgeous! (then slaps his hands together to make her think Charlie's hitting him) OW!! OW!!! (smugly) You don't know who you're messing with.