Ben: Last time I took it, I was a Tom.
Tom: What?! No, no, no, no!! Take it again! Ugh, I have to go recalibrate the quiz!

The Gang: Surprise!
Leslie: Oh wow!
Ben: That's what you wanted right? Everyone in the same room, at the same time?
Leslie: I can't believe you. We're all together in the same room. This room. I don't think I could be any happier!
Ben: Wanna bet?
Ann: Hi!
Leslie: Oh Ann's here! Ann's here!

Ben: Now one's ever asked me how my kids are or who's taking care of them. By the way who's taking care of them?
Leslie: My -- my mom, everythings fine.

I love how independent my wife is, and for that reason, I will not let her speak! That came out wrong.

She's an exceptional human being, who married a well-intentioned goof ball.

Ben: I'm Ben Wyatt and I'm running for Congress.
Leslie: That was so hot.

Ben: You have an opinion on pockets!
Leslie: Yes! I think they should all be bigger!

Ben: You're my sexy roommate, we love each other!
Leslie: Whoo! That's me!

Ron: I'm not a spy, and I would not reveal classified information -
Ben: Do you have to say that every time?
Ron: Yeah.

Did you hear a word I said?! No you didn't! Because I'm a ghost!

Ben: Please write it in cursive, it raises a lot of red fl-
Ron: No.

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Ben: You're my friend.
April: No I'm not, I've never cared for you.

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April

I'm allergic to sushi. Every time I eat more than 80 pieces, I throw up.

Andy