Parks and Recreation

Ben Wyatt Quotes

Ben: Where did you get a Washington Monument figurine at midnight on a Tuesday?
Leslie: From my office - I have like 50 of them.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ben: Why are you laughing?
Leslie: Because my dream is dead.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ben: In the last few weeks, we've turned this campaign into a
well-oiled machine. Leslie's stump speech is 10 minutes, 40 seconds,
every time. Here, check this out. There will be a big laugh right ...
now. And now a two-second awkward silence as Leslie does her Rodney
Dangerfield impression.
 • Rating: Unrated

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jen: After a rough start, your girl's doing ok.
Ben: I think she's doing a little better than ok, or did you miss the applause she got on the raccoon safety question?
 • Rating: Unrated

Ben: Hypothetical crisis: Leslie just tried to answer a question, but audibly farted and then threw up. Spin.
Chris: Leslie Knope is literally overflowing with ideas for this town. And speaking about methane, have you heard about her plan to limit greenhouse gas emissions?
 • Rating: Unrated

Ben: Are you hitting on Leslie for me?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ben: I guess we'll just set fire to the studio or something.
Leslie: Oh that's so sweet, I've never had a boyfriend willing to commit arson for me before.
Donna: It gets old.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ben: Senior citizens are basically the only people who vote in local elections. So if you want to win you gotta get the gray vote.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ben: I'm not afraid of cops. I have no reason to be I never break any laws, ever, because I'm deathly afraid of cops.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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