Are you gonna murder me and bury me at this gas station?

Tom: Ben, Leslie hired my company to get her that sticker. You're the one that told me businesses need "clients" to get "money."
Ben: I was the first one to tell you that?

Is she gonna powder her vagina?

Tom: It's almost too easy.
Ben: I can hear you.
Tom: I know you can Ben, that's how easy it is.

I would guess that they would be bankrupt by the end of this sentence.

I was completely flustered, I came off like an idiot. I mean, at one point, for no reason, I just took off my shoes and held them in my hand.

Leslie: Oh President Reagan, my blazer popped open.

Ben: Well, Maggy Thatcher, let me help you with that. Our countries have had a very special relationship.

Ben: Show me Pelosi again.

Leslie: Okay, lay down.

[To Leslie] Your Mom, kind of made a pass at me.

Leslie: When I first met you I thought you were a fascist hard ass.

Ben: What?

Ben: Should we talk about how you claimed your mom was a Filipino woman you've never met.

Leslie: Should we?

Ben: I think at some point you and I should probably make out with each other.

Leslie: Yeah, good call.

Parks & Rec Quotes

You know why tonight is so much fun? Because everyone's so gay. And they know how to have fun, and the dancing ... everyone is just who they are and who they are is just stone cold gay.

Leslie

Haha, "Euro-trash," I like that. That is indeed a garbage continent.

Ron