New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX
New girl
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Schmidt: I get that. Your business is selling sex. You're a sex worker.
CeCe: You're an idiot.

Jess: Nick kissed me?
Cece: WHAAAAAAAAAA?

Cece: I thought I threw that thing out the window.
Schmidt: That only made it stronger.

Cece: I'm still marrying an Indian guy.
Schmidt: Sure, but you went home with a Jew in a turban. I'm just saying.

CeCe: Make sure you use protection.
Schmidt: CeCe, she's a foreigner. What do you think I am? An idiot?

Cece: You know that guy I'm dating?
Schmidt: Buster, your child bride?

Cece:Do you have any agave?
Schmidt: We might have some pressed lentils syrups in the mixin's cabinet.

Cece: You look like a character from The Love Guru.
Schmidt: Aw, thank you.

Nadia: Jew in the couch!
CeCe: Nadia, American manners!
Nadia: Sorry. Jew person in couch.
Schmidt: She's not wrong.

CeCe: Are you "White Fanging" me?
Schmidt: What?
CeCe: White Fang? The only book you have on your Kindle. The book you wouldn't stop talking about, and I said, "Would you please stop talking about White Fang" and then you said, "Someday, I'm gonna do that to somebody".

Schmidt: You like me? You like my personality?
CeCe: I was surprised, too.

Schmidt: CeCe, are you pregnant?
CeCe: I don't know. We have to wait for the test results, but I'm late.
Schmidt: We made a caramel miracle!

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 17 in total

New Girl Quotes

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

Nick

I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"

Coach