New Girl

New Girl Quotes

Season 2 Episode 25: "Elaine's Big Day"

Elizabeth: There are so many cool traditions at this thing! The groom comes in on a white horse!
Schmidt: So, basically, they're just copying my bar mitzvah.
 • Rating: 2.5 / 5.0

Schmidt: It's only romantic because it's a wedding. I'd be just as happy to sabotage, I don't know, let's say, her tax audit.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Jess: I don't think the badger's actually rabid, I think he's just kind of a d**k.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Winston: I'm staying positive, but I'm pretty sure this is where we die.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Nick: Jess, this is where I belong! With Winston and a badger.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Nick: Schmidt gave me his worst suit! He said if I could get it over my thighs, he didn't want it!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Nick: I look very handsome! I look like I'm on "Miami Vice"!
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 2 Episode 24: "Winston's Birthday"

Principal: We used to have a school goat named Melvin. He hung himself, tragically, on the swing set.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jess: Burquas isn't you guys, is it?
 • Rating: Unrated

Jess: Life's messy. It kicks you in the ass. That's right, I said ass.
 • Rating: Unrated

Nick: I don't know how you get a podcast, but you should look into it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mr. Day: What's she like?
Nick: She's not quirky. She has no bangs.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mr. Day: I didn't gay my way out of Vietnam just to get killed by some punk.
 • Rating: Unrated

Elizabeth: If they make fun of you, I'll punch them in the penis.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Winston: I know you're lying, and I'm hurt, but I'm gonna eat this anyway
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 2 Episode 23: "Virgins"

Prostitute: Aren't you a virgin, too?
Winston: Just my penis, baby. Just my penis.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jess: The only anti-depressant you need is in my pants!
Guy: It's really a medical issue.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jess: So, would you like to freak?
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Nick: Sometimes I just sit in the stall and listen to you guys.
 • Rating: Unrated

Schmidt: A tuxedo is different from a suit.
Nick: It is??!!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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