Parks and Recreation

Chris Traeger Quotes

Chris: If I keep my body moving, and my mind occupied at all times, I
will avoid falling into a bottomless pit of despair.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ben: Hypothetical crisis: Leslie just tried to answer a question, but audibly farted and then threw up. Spin.
Chris: Leslie Knope is literally overflowing with ideas for this town. And speaking about methane, have you heard about her plan to limit greenhouse gas emissions?
 • Rating: Unrated

Chris: If I had to have anybody tell me that I have cancer, I would want it to be me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chris: You and I will embark in a quick session of heart-rate meditation, focusing on conscious breathing and opening the heart shakra.
Ron: I'm not sure I'm interested in that. No, I am sure, I'm not interested in that.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chris: I'm engrossed in this book. It's the true story of a woman born with no arms and no legs who attempted to swim the English Channel.
April: That's impossible.
Chris: Oh she drowned immediately. It's kind of a sad story.
April: Cool.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chris: The world's my gymnasium Ron!
 • Rating: Unrated

Chris: And then my herbalist took this weird bee pollen paste, rubbed it around my gums, and now my mouth feels like a spaceship.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Chris: Rethink our visual brand, take these words, and make something amazing!
Tom: So you're saying you want me to choose a new font?
Chris: Yes, essentially I'd like you to choose a new font.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Chris: Now how big is the park, exactly?
Leslie: It is .000003 square miles.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Chris: You're beautiful! On the inside... where your spirit lives.
 • Rating: Unrated

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