Denise [to Lucy after she yells at a cadaver]: Hey stop being weird, I'm trying to be my sandwich around some corpses.
Lucy: Why are you eating your lunch in here?
Denise: Why are you yelling at a dead guy? See, we all have a lot of questions.

Cox: About as ridiculous as your five o'clock shadow. There's times I'm doing rounds and I feel like I'm teaching Yasser Arafat.
Denise: Really? I see a slightly gayer George Michael.
Cox: Oh, I so see that.
Drew: Could you please be more alike?

Denise: What's going on? You texted that someone was coding in here.
Dr. Cox: You texted me, "come and show me your boobs."
Drew: I may have switched those texts, which does raise the question, why did you come, Dr. Cox?

That's exactly what Trang needed. Driving back and forth in the parking lot, reinforcing every stereotype of Asian drivers.

Denise: So, little Jack's a baseball fan, eh?
Jordan: He's two and he can't talk yet.
Denise: You know what you should do? You should get him some baseball cards! I got my son, Davey, a Ken Griffey Jr. card? Carries it with him wherever he goes. Never liked the gum, though. Gum's a weird word, isn't it? You know? Do you ever notice some words, you say 'em enough, they don't even sound like words anymore? Gum.... Gum. Gum. Gum! Gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gum, gummmm. Gum gum gum...

Denise: Hey hun, before you hop in there, could you do me a little favoronie and check the windshield wiper. I think I got something caught up there.
Dr. Cox: No problem. I got it.
Denise: (Turns on ambulance siren) Hahaha! I always get the newbies with that one! Hahahahaha got you! You know it!
Dr. Cox: When they strap me in please let them know the murder was just.

Denise: Docta, docta give me the news, I got a...
Dr. Cox: Yeah I'm not a big car singin' kinda guy.
Denise: Aww bad case of lovin' you, Per. Come on, where's the fun?

Dr. Cox: Denise, that's not very likely. And here's why: All you do is talk, talk, talk talk, talk, talk, talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk. And when you're not talking, I'm betting you're thinking about talking. I mean, can I ask you a personal question? Have you ever had a thought that you didn't immediately verbalize?
Denise: Well, I don't know. That's a tough one, Perr.
Dr. Cox: Uh-huh.
Denise: Oh, look, the window's open again! You can see the moon!

Denise: I think that's how my nose got bent. Who knows? Nose knows. I love words, don't you love words?
Dr. Cox: I like "strangle".

Denise: Ooh, he's just such a cutie pie! Look at that! Have you ever had cutie pie, Perry?
Dr. Cox: No, 'course not.
Denise: I like it la mode.

Dr. Cox: Oh my God. What happened in your life that made you so needy that you've got to fill every waking second by babbling on?
Denise: Fine, don't visit. My son will come.
Dr. Cox: And now we are right back on your son again. I'll be honest with you, I'm worried that I'm not going to be able to get your voice out of my head. It is a very real concern.

Dr. Cox: Boy, I tell you what, there, Jordan, I'm sure glad that shift is-
Denise: Perry! I was just telling Jordan here about that sneezing attack that I had this morning. Was it fourteen or fifteen sneezes?
Jordan: Yes, Perry, was it fourteen or fifteen sneezes?
Dr. Cox: What are you doing here, Denise?
Denise: Well, I heard that you were doing back to back shifts, so I pulled a couple of strings so that we could get the old band back together!
Jordan: Perry! You've always wanted to be in a band!
Denise: Get out of town! I just came up with that band thing!
Jordan: Get out of town, Perry!

Scrubs Quotes

J.D.: Hey, I heard a great joke. A guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth." And the dentist says, "Well, if you think you're a moth, why are you at a dentist's office?"
J.D.'s narration: Oh, no, I forgot the punchline... You can't bail out now! Stall! Stall!
J.D.: ...So the moth says "That's a good question. What kind of dentist are you?" And the dentist says, "Well, I'm a general dentist, but I...I do dabble in orthodontry - braces and such." And... and the moth says, "Orthodontry? I hear there's great money in that."
J.D.'s narration: "The light was on"!
J.D.: "But! To answer your original question, which was, if I think I'm a moth, why am I in a dentist's office? The answer is, Because the light was on!" The light! The light, James. Moths love light. So, James, other than your funny bone being broken, what seems to be the problem?

Lady: Love your Hairmet.
J.D.: Love yours!