The Simpsons

The Simpsons

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Dr. Hibbert Quotes

Season 24, Episode 15: "Black Eyed, Please"
Hibbert:You may never see a film in 3D again. Hehehe.
Homer: But the storytelling is finally catching up to the technology.
 • Rating: Unrated
Season 22, Episode 10: "Moms I'd Like To Forget"
Dr. Hibbert [about Comic Book Guy]: Tell him it's the "worst prognosis ever!" Hee hee hee.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 21, Episode 16: "The Greatest Story Ever D'ohed"
Dr. Hibbert: Mind if I have a word with your wife?
Homer: As you wish. But look upon her not with lust. And do not send her friendly emails, that's how it begins.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 20, Episode 16: "Eeny Teeny Maya Moe"
Moe: You gotta make me shorter, Doc.
Dr. Hibbert: (laughs) What do you mean?
Moe: I mean take out bones, guts, whatever you gotta do to make me a micro Moe.
Dr. Hibbert: What your asking is completely unethical. No licensed physician would preform that operation.
(Cut to Dr. Nick about to put the anesthesia mask on Moe)
Dr. Nick: Now close your eyes and when you wake up you will be a woman.
Moe: No, no, no, no, no! I-I wanna be shorter, for a woman.
Dr. Nick: Uh oh. I mixed you up with the last guy.
(A shortened Mr. Largo walks in)
Mr. Largo: (screams) I look nothing like Julie Newmar!
 • Rating: Unrated
Season 20, Episode 2: "Lost Verizon"
(Dr. Hibbert gives Bart money after retrieving his golf ball.)
Bart: A dollar? What for?
Dr. Hibbert: It's the least I could do. These balls cost five dollars new.
Bart: So I can get a dollar for every ball I find? Then if a cell phone costs $100, how many balls do I need?
Dr. Hibbert: (speaking aside to Dr. Riviera, his caddy) This is why my kids go to private school. (Laughs)
 • Rating: Unrated
Season 19, Episode 2: "Homer of Seville"
Dr. Hibbert: Homer, you have a mild back sprain. And you also ingested a dangerous quantity of grave dirt.
Homer: Well, you're always telling me I should eat more dirt.
Dr. Hibbert: Not dirt, vegetables!
Homer: Which grow in what?
 • Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 20: "The Boy Who Knew Too Much"
Dr. Hibbert: Well, only one in two million people has what we call the "evil gene". Hitler had it, Walt Disney had it, and... Freddy Quimby has it.
Lionel Hutz: Thank you, Dr. Hibbert. I rest my case.
Judge Snyder: You rest your case?
Lionel Hutz: What? Oh no, I thought that was just a figure of speech. Case closed.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 14: "Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy"
Dr. Hibbert: Without further ado, I give you the man who puts young people behind bars, where they belong, TV's 'Matlock'.
 • Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 13: "Homer and Apu"
Dr. Hibbert: Homer's illness is either caused by ingesting spoiled food, or some sort of voodoo curse.
Patty: (Holding a voodoo doll) Hey, we've just been working the eyes.
 • Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 8: "Boy-Scoutz N the Hood"
Dr. Hibbert: Don't thank me - thank the knife!
 • Rating: Unrated

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Total Quotes: 19
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