Eric: [to Serena] There are strangers having sex in your bed.
Serena: Oh God.

Rufus: Hope I'm doing the right thing.
Jenny: If you want to keep Serena out of the papers, Dad, this is the way to do it.
Eric: You own all the pictures now.
Photo guy: Not all of them. There is one photographer my group hasn't been able to reach yet.

Dan: I see the cat's out of the bag.
Rufus: And topless on Valentino's yacht.
Jenny: That's not fair. Everyone's topless on Valentino's yacht.
Rufus: What about this one where's she's dancing on the table?
Eric: Well, that's what you do in Barcelona.
Rufus: And this one with Prince Harry doing shots off of —
Dan: That's what you do in St. Tropez!

Dan: [sees Serena in tabloid] Oh my god.
Eric: It's not what you think ...
Dan: So much for eat, pray, love. Well, I guess she got the love part right ...

Whoa, '72 Bowie is a dead ringer for Shakira.

Jenny: Eric, Constance is gonna be so great now! No more hierarchy, no more mean girls. They won't copy how the queen dresses. It's going to be a new era of sunlight and fairness.
Eric: I don't think that's what Blair had in mind when she picked you as her successor.
Jenny: Too bad! Hey, when does Jonathan get back from his fencing camp in Torino?
Eric: Not 'til next month. [sees girls dressed like J] Oh, that's disturbing.

Eric: She's still the same Jenny underneath. She just has to wear the mask for school.
Jonathan: That mask is becoming her face.

Jenny: Can we agree not to say the word steps anymore?
Eric: I would like nothing better.

Jenny: You know I have to act this way about school stuff. I'm still your friend. I'm still your sister. I just can't let the worlds get confused.
Eric: I'm not confused. I want nothing to do with you in either world.

Jenny: Everyone gets egged on Halloween.
Eric: You didn't.

Eric: It helps if you count out loud.
Jenny: Eric you don't have to be nice to me. I've been so awful to you and Jonathan.
Eric: True. But I'm a better person than you.
Jenny: Also true.

[to Chuck] Yeah... 'How Well Do You Know Blair Waldorf' is a little boring to those of us who actually know Blair Waldorf.

Gossip Girl Quotes

Even Blair Waldorf can not bend DNA to her will.

Dan

Hazel: Do you know what you're doing, Little J?
Jenny: I'm not Little J anymore.