Favorite Ignacio Suarez Quotes
Ignacio: You have such a big heart
Betty: Stop it with the big heart. The speech didn't work when I was cast as a rock in the school play... or when I was sitting at home with you and mom on prom night.. and it's not gonna work now
Ignacio: Betty you'll always be my special girl, you know that....just so you know you were a really terrific rock
Ignacio: We have flan
Amanda: What's a flan?
Ignacio: It's delicious custard
Amanda: OH BRING IT!
How does your boss take his coffee? On the rocks?
Betty told me to feed and water you
Ignacio: That girl has the vocal chords of a large cat
Hilda: I heard that
Ignacio: ...and the ears of whatever hears best
Betty: A dolphin
Betty [on hidden bluetooth]: Betty Suarez
Ignacio: I know, I named you
[about dating Constance to get his green card...]
Ignacio: I don't play that game
Tucson: You want your green card? You don't have a choice man. You ride that squishy train until you reach your destination
Betty: Dad thank you for coming, I have to get back to work
Ignacio: I was just concerned
[Ignacio takes out camera]
Ignacio: ... and I was hoping to get a look at the shemale!
Betty: Dad!
[Betty takes camera]
[Hilda is cutting Igancio's hair...]
Hilda: I have to practice.. come on papi you said I could if I gave you a beer
Ignacio: Yeah but you had two
Hilda: I was nervous
Ignacio: This is the first time I get to vote...
Hilda: Papi, last year you voted five times on Dancing with the Stars
Ignacio: Only because that Kristi Yamaguchi is an Asian ball of fire
Hilda: I can't have my clients see you in your crabby old man pajamas..
Ignacio: You worry about yourself, you're crabby in the morning
[after Ignacio awkwardly walks into Betty's to see a naked coach...]
Hilda: papi what are you doing here?
Dad: I came to protect Betty, install some locks
Coach: What'd you get, Sleigh locks?
Dad: No, Quickset
Coach: Oh those are good
