Popular Joel Graham Quotes
Joel: Does telling me exactly what I should say make you feel like less of a control freak?
Julia: All right fine, this is who I am. I am going to except it. I'm a control freak.
Julia: I'm going back out there. I've read ten books on sex-ed I think I have a little bit of a better handle on how to explain a penis to a six year old girl.
Joel: Can we just give it five or six years to shake off the damage we've done and start fresh?
Zeek: Got some anger in you?
Joel: Well...
Zeek: A little spirit. I like that. I don't think I've ever heard you say more than five words since I knew you.
Joel: Well...
Zeek: No really, I hear you and I see you.
Julia: And besides there are three Amy's, we can blame it on the other one.
Joel: What happens when we run out of Amy's?
Julia: You think of something.
Joel: You said that so seductively, clever girl.
Joel: If we're going to have another baby Julia there has to be room for me. You can't be the one making all the plans and I just, I can't be the yes man.
Julia: I know, I do.
Joel: What am I going to do; I'm going to show them how to use fabric softener properly?
Zeek: Joel, I mean really. These kids are kindergartners, you could light your own fart and they would think you were Einstein. Come on!
Bravermantitus, it slowly eats away at your brain until you become exactly like them.
Nate: Oh drama, baby thinks that Crosby stole {the school play} from him.
Joel: Thanks, that didn't make me sound petty at all.
Joel: I can't do this, honey.
Julia: Why not?
Joel: I don't even know where to start. Ths room is freezing, I'm sitting here, they're playing muzak, there are people walking by and they gave me a stack of Playboys from the 1980s and told me to give 'em a call when I'm done. It's so weird, honey.
Julia: Well, what do you want me to do? Do you, um, do you want me to help?
Joel: Whaddya mean?
Julia: I mean, like, phone sex.
Joel: You know how to do that?
Max has definitely benefited from the program we have at Footpath socially, and the last thing we would want to do is talk ourselves out of having a fine family such as yours at our community. However, you need to decide if max would be better off at a school where he would meet his full potential socially and academically.
Max's Teacher
Joel: Awesome, awesome.Thank you, so much. Yeah, baby, my boys can swim. Woo!
Sydney. Swim? Daddy, are we getting fish?
Joel: No, daddy just did really well on a test.
Oh jeez I'm sorry, I forgot the cardinal rule, only a Braverman can criticize another Braverman.
