That was a phone. This looks like you're pointing at someplace to sell your gold.

Oh, I've made a pun.

Lucille Bluth

I got Olive Garden to offer us unlimited bread.

Lucille Bluth

I'll be out on parole by the time you work up a tear.

If I'd have told them we were taking a whole bunch of gays out there to get married they'd have thrown me a parade. Let's tell them we were taking a bunch of gays out there to get married!

Lucille: "We yelled at you to leave.
Buster: But then you whispered 'Don't pull out.'
Gob: GAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH.

George Sr: Where's Barry?
Lucille: He's with the harbormaster. He's trying to dazzle them with a suit of his own.
Barry: Well, he hated the suit. Thought I was making fun.

Lucille: Michael's right. And I, for one, will not go back to wondering whether there's going to be enough food on the table. (Table creaks and wobbles)
Michael: Might wanna start worrying about the table.

Lucille: (to the hot sailors) You boys know how to shovel coal?
Narrator: I don't even want to tell you what these guys thought that meant.

Michael: So, it's embezzlement, bribery and conspiracy.
Lucille: And a whole lot of love.
Michael: Oh, right: and perjury.

Buster: Oh, I'm not comfortable near the ocean since the seal attack. The ocean is my second biggest fear.
Lucille: Good, don't come. I need to be rubbing elbows, not working your fork.

Lucille: Michael. What a surprise.
Michael: Really? Were you expecting somebody else? Maybe, uh, one of your two daughters?
Lucille: Oh, Lindsay and Tobias never visit.

Arrested Development Quotes

She sometimes takes a little pack of mayonnaise and she'll squirt it in her mouth all over. And then she'll take an egg and kind of...mmmm! She calls it a 'mayon-egg.' Are you okay?

George Michael

Oh, mercy me! I forgot that we were in the colonies.

Mrs. Featherbottom