Lucille Quotes
Season 3, Episode 13: "Development Arrested"
Lucille: (to the hot sailors) You boys know how to shovel coal?
Narrator: I don't even want to tell you what these guys thought that meant.
• Rating: 4.7 / 5.0
Buster: Oh, I'm not comfortable near the ocean since the seal attack. The ocean is my second biggest fear.
Lucille: Good, don't come. I need to be rubbing elbows, not working your fork.
• Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
Lucille: Michael's right. And I, for one, will not go back to wondering whether there's going to be enough food on the table. (Table creaks and wobbles)
Michael: Might wanna start worrying about the table.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Michael: So, it's embezzlement, bribery and conspiracy.
Lucille: And a whole lot of love.
Michael: Oh, right: and perjury.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 11: "Family Ties"
(Lucille's necklace has just stuck to the magnet)
Lucille: That's not a real gold necklace, is it?
George, Sr.: Well, it wasn't really your 50th birthday.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Lucille: Michael. What a surprise.
Michael: Really? Were you expecting somebody else? Maybe, uh, one of your two daughters?
Lucille: Oh, Lindsay and Tobias never visit.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 10: "Fakin' It"
Brian: Hope you don't mind me saying, but these things can go on indefinitely. My mother's been in that bed for two years.
Lucille: (gasps) Oh, how awful. We don't have a private room.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 9: "S.O.B.s"
Michael: Gob, pal, how about you? Can you find some work?
Gob: Oh, sure, Michael. As what, a waiter? Can I get you something, madam?
Lucille: I will have a vodka, though.
(Lucille and Gob laugh)
Gob: What? Oh.
Michael: You know, if you'd ever accidentally worked a day in your life, you'd know that there's no indignity in it.
Gob: Great. She'll have a vodka.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 7: "Prison Break-In"
Lucille: I want to cry so badly, but I don't think I can spare the moisture.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Lucille: You can smuggle yourself out because I'm staying in the conjugal trailer with Warden Gentles.
George, Sr.: Him?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Are we missing your favorite quote from "?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!
Total Quotes: 170
