Mac's Dad: Now everyone thinks I'm a rat. They're gonna kill me in here, because of you.
Mac: I'm sorry. I still love you.
Mac's Dad: I don't.

Mac: Tell us more!
Charlie's Mom: Then Luther went in Eduardo's butt for a while.
Mac: Tell us less, tell us less.
Charlie's Mom: Then they both completed on each other -- I was left out of the finale.

Mac: Okay, daddy. I love you dad!
Charlie: Let it go. Let it go.

Mac: You have a bad shoulder, and that's why you could never have a catch with me, right?
Mac's Dad: Riiiiiight.

Mac: Thanks for coming with me, man.
Charlie: Well, you're forcing me too, so, yeah.

I'm gonna save my dad's life!

Mac: Bro you texted us 911 what’s the emergency?!
Charlie: Uh, well, our friendships in danger!

Dennis: We gotta get back in our apartment man.
Mac: Yeah I know, I hate Dee.
Dennis: Yeah I hate her.


Mac: Did you do that?
Dennis: You know what? I think I did.
Mac: Yeah I think I saw you!

Dennis: It was Mac's stupid plan.
Mac: Then why did you scratch me?
Dennis: Because you annoyed.

How can a whole group have the same idea? What, do they say it all at once? That's ludicrous.

Oh, and also, he murdered and ate his family.