Hell hath no fury like two women scorned.

Marshall

Never in my life have I been kicked out of a room, now it's been twice in one week. You're a bad influence.

Marshall

Where'd you find the time to shoot J.R.?

Cross my heart and hope to die. I really mean that last part.

They're like the fake family in the frame.

You can take all of your pervy little babysitter fantasies and stick them in a drawer.

There's such a thing as too many choices. I long for the days of three TV channels.

Gross. What's with all the nature?

Marshall: I'm so screwed.
Mary: No your not. We are. We're so screwed.

How are you suppose to know the guy's got super Spidey powers?

Hey. Back off, Mary Poppins.

These guys have long memories and hollow point bullets.

In Plain Sight Quotes

One of the most difficult moments in anyone's life is when the fog of childhood lifts and we see for the first time our parents as people.

Mary

Marshall: You are in a different kind of mood this morning.
Mary: Actually, I'm in a really good mood. Which is kind of weird considering where I was 48 hours ago. Then I had a witness off herself and, like that is not bad enough, I've got to play second fiddle to a knucklehead like you.
Marshall: Thanks for lumping me in with kidnapping, attempted rape and suicide. Can't tell you how much that means.