Mercedes: You think Puck and Santana will acknowledge my existence if we're not in glee club together.
Puck: She has a point.

Puck: Girl, you got more curves than a Nissan ad.
Mercedes: Seriously? That's what you came up with?

Puck: I'm a sex shark. If I stop moving, I die.
Mercedes: Me and you would not work out. You're top 40. I'm rhythm and blues.

Why does everyone assume I'm angry all the time? It's called being sassy.

Kurt: You shouldn't be embarrassed about your boy.
Mercedes: Embarrassed ? I'm worried about showing too much skin and causing a sex riot.

Mercedes: That would make you, like, 30.
Sue: 29.

As soon as I get my record deal, I'm not speaking to any of you.

I can't be co-captain. No time. Kwanza!

Why do we need to go all vanilla on this song? What we need is my chocolate thunder.

The slushee wars have commenced. None of us are safe.

Mercedes: Can we try something a little more black?
Rachel: It's glee club. Not crunk club.

Kurt: You busted my window.
Mercedes: Well, you busted my heart.

Glee Quotes

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.

Rachel

I just want somebody to love me.

Quinn