The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSFavorite Penny Quotes
Sheldon: I'll have a diet Coke.
Penny: Can you please order a cocktail? I need to practice mixing drinks.
Sheldon: Fine... I'll have a virgin Cuba Libre.
Penny: That's... rum and Coke without the rum.
Sheldon: Yes, and would you make it diet?
Penny: Wow, you've got a lot of money in there.
Sheldon: That's why it's guarded by snakes.
Leonard: How does a miserable date end in sex?
Penny: I don't know, it's complicated.
Leonard: Well, I'm a pretty smart guy and right now my brain has dibs on the blood supply so give it a go.
Penny: Ooh I thought I smelled pizza.
Sheldon: That's remarkable. If pepperoni were an explosive substance, you could replace German Shepherds at our nation's airports.
Penny: He wasn't intellectually stimulating enough.
Bernadette: Couldn't you just fool around with him and then listen to NPR?
Penny: Wouldn't help. Zack couldn't even spell NPR.
Sheldon: I don't think there's anything in this jewelry store that Amy would appreciate more than the humidifier that we were just looking at at Sears.
Penny: Oh, my God, now I know what I sound like to you when I say stupid stuff.
Amy: Goodnight, Painting Penny. Goodnight, Real Penny.
Penny: Goodnight, Real Amy.
Amy: You don't have to say goodnight to Painting Amy, because she's never leaving. Bernadette: Goodnight, Real Penny. Goodnight, Transvestite Penny.
Today's the day a girl's finally going to touch you in your little special place.
I'm from Nebraska. When we shoot things, it's because we want to eat em' or make them leave our boyfriends alone
Penny: Sheldon, what do you want?
Sheldon: I'm certain this will come as no surprise to you, but Leonard is failing in yet another relationship.
Penny: He's having problems with Stephanie?
Sheldon: She's sending virtual livestock to random men on the Internet
You know, for the first couple of months, whenever I would take off my bra, he would giggle and say 'oh, boy, my breast friends!'
Penny [referring to Leonard]
Leonard: This tray contains clues as to what you and I are going to be doing on Valentine's Day.
Penny: Wow okay, let's see. We got milk chocolate, Swiss cheese, fondue... my lactose intolerant boyfriend is going to eat all this and I'm going to climb on your back and rocket to the moon?
