Popular Serena van der Woodsen Quotes
Dan: The arts and crafts were impressive, but how did you manage the real snow?
Serena: I'm well connected.
Dan: This is, without question, the best Christmas ever.
Serena: Ever. In the history of Christmas.
Lily: When you two are done hiding up here, I'm taking you both out for dessert.
Serena: Can't, mom. I'm busy.
Lily: But this is important for our family. It would be just the three of us.
Serena: Mom, every time you say, "it would be just the three of us," it means you're dating someone new. Whoever it is, I don't care. I'll just see him at the wedding.
Lily: Fine. Then, I'll just tell you who it is because you're going to be seeing him around from now on. It's Bart Bass.
Eric and Serena: Bart Bass!?
Serena: Mom, you cannot date Bart Bass.
Lily: You just said a moment ago you don't care who it was.
Serena: That was before I knew who it was.
Blair: (after threatening Vanessa to back off Dan) I'm going to go check on my daddy!
Serena: I thought you were going to help.
Blair: I think my work's done here.
Vanessa: Well, Dan's not really that into things.
Serena: Which makes shopping for him kind of hopeless. The only thing he wants for Christmas is snow. It's not like I can give him that.
Vanessa: You sure?
Serena: Hey. I come to you hat in hand, tail between my legs, and off my high horse. I spent the entire day searching for the perfect gift for Dan. Now, all the stores are closing, Christmas day is looming and, um... I need your help.
Vanessa: I could take this opportunity to gloat, but I actually like you. So, let's get down to business.
Blair: You know, I called you about an hour ago, BTW. You're late.
Serena: Um, you're lucky I'm even here at all. It's Christmas Eve and I still haven't found a gift for Dan. Now, all the stores are closing and I'm totally screwed. Do you have any idea what you can buy for under $50 these days?
Blair: I don't know. A single entrée in a mid-price restaurant? Three-quarters of a DVD box set? Maybe a pair of Wilfrid stockings?
Serena: Oh, stockings! Yes! Great idea for Dan! Blair, please, this is serious.
Blair: I don't know, why don't you buy him a gold money for $49.99. He won't know the difference.
Vanessa: Hey! If it's any help, I could tell you Dan's favorite used-book shops.
Serena: That's okay. I think I got it.
Serena: I noticed the other day that you don't wear a watch. And then it occurred to me it's because you don't have a watch. You're going to need one to be punctual for all the meetings with editors and publishers, now that you're fancy and, apparently, self-important writer... You don't like it. You want the band changed.
Dan: No! I love the band. I love the whole thing. It's the most amazing watch I've ever seen... but I can't accept this.
Serena: What? Yes, you can. Look, it's more of a gift for me because I had so much fun picking it out for you. You have to.
Dan: Serena, I buy a book for my dad every Christmas. I think the most elaborate gift I've ever given has been a pair of rubber boots from L.L. Bean.
Serena: So, then, I overdid it?
Dan: I think even when you're underdoing it, you're overdoing it.
Blair: A real Waldorf Christmas eve. Eleanor drew the line at Christmas day. That's only for me, her, and Dorota.
Serena: Well, it's still a couple days with your dad.
Blair: No, it'll be more than just a couple of days. I'm going to convince him to stay in New York.
Serena: What about Paris and Roman?
Blair: Roman is a phase. My father belongs here with me. He only left New York to ride out the scandal. It's time to come home, don't you think? Hey, did you want to ask me something?
Serena: Yes! A gift idea for Dan, now that Vanessa brought him the most thoughtful Dan-like present ever.
Blair: Why don't you just buy a new outfit for Cedric and call it a day?
Serena: Thank you! For being totally not helpful, at all. See you tomorrow night.
Blair: Bye!
Chuck: You know, if my dad and your mom come back from South Africa tomorrow engaged we'll be brother and sister. And you know what they say, the family that plays together stays together.
Serena: Ah. Incest, the universal taboo. One of the, uh, only ones you haven't violated.
Chuck: I'm game if you are.
Serena: "What are you up to besides missing me?"
Dan: "Just wondering whether you were missing me."
Serena: You know my mom: if it's not broke, break it.
