Serena van der Woodsen Quotes
Serena: I noticed the other day that you don't wear a watch. And then it occurred to me it's because you don't have a watch. You're going to need one to be punctual for all the meetings with editors and publishers, now that you're fancy and, apparently, self-important writer... You don't like it. You want the band changed.
Dan: No! I love the band. I love the whole thing. It's the most amazing watch I've ever seen... but I can't accept this.
Serena: What? Yes, you can. Look, it's more of a gift for me because I had so much fun picking it out for you. You have to.
Dan: Serena, I buy a book for my dad every Christmas. I think the most elaborate gift I've ever given has been a pair of rubber boots from L.L. Bean.
Serena: So, then, I overdid it?
Dan: I think even when you're underdoing it, you're overdoing it.
Vanessa: Hey! If it's any help, I could tell you Dan's favorite used-book shops.
Serena: That's okay. I think I got it.
Blair: You know, I called you about an hour ago, BTW. You're late.
Serena: Um, you're lucky I'm even here at all. It's Christmas Eve and I still haven't found a gift for Dan. Now, all the stores are closing and I'm totally screwed. Do you have any idea what you can buy for under $50 these days?
Blair: I don't know. A single entrée in a mid-price restaurant? Three-quarters of a DVD box set? Maybe a pair of Wilfrid stockings?
Serena: Oh, stockings! Yes! Great idea for Dan! Blair, please, this is serious.
Blair: I don't know, why don't you buy him a gold money for $49.99. He won't know the difference.
Serena: Hey. I come to you hat in hand, tail between my legs, and off my high horse. I spent the entire day searching for the perfect gift for Dan. Now, all the stores are closing, Christmas day is looming and, um... I need your help.
Vanessa: I could take this opportunity to gloat, but I actually like you. So, let's get down to business.
Vanessa: Well, Dan's not really that into things.
Serena: Which makes shopping for him kind of hopeless. The only thing he wants for Christmas is snow. It's not like I can give him that.
Vanessa: You sure?
Blair: (after threatening Vanessa to back off Dan) I'm going to go check on my daddy!
Serena: I thought you were going to help.
Blair: I think my work's done here.
Lily: When you two are done hiding up here, I'm taking you both out for dessert.
Serena: Can't, mom. I'm busy.
Lily: But this is important for our family. It would be just the three of us.
Serena: Mom, every time you say, "it would be just the three of us," it means you're dating someone new. Whoever it is, I don't care. I'll just see him at the wedding.
Lily: Fine. Then, I'll just tell you who it is because you're going to be seeing him around from now on. It's Bart Bass.
Eric and Serena: Bart Bass!?
Serena: Mom, you cannot date Bart Bass.
Lily: You just said a moment ago you don't care who it was.
Serena: That was before I knew who it was.
Dan: The arts and crafts were impressive, but how did you manage the real snow?
Serena: I'm well connected.
Dan: This is, without question, the best Christmas ever.
Serena: Ever. In the history of Christmas.
Dan: Are we really gonna do this?
Serena: Yeah.
Serena: Merry Christmas!
Dan: [speechless]
Serena: Do you like it? Do you think it's cheesy?
Dan: No, no its incredible. How did you do this?
Serena: Well, I had help from my elves.
Dan: Your present is waiting for you at home. But, um, I did bring you a little pre-present.
Serena: This is your story.
Dan: Its the original. Right out of the spiral notebook.
Serena: I'm kinda scared to read it. What happened on October 8th, 2005?
Dan: Umm, well I was accidentally invited to a birthday party. Where I met a girl. She only spoke two sentences to me but I've never forgotten her.
Serena: Wait, your story is about me?
Eric: [about Bart Bass] He only has one facial expression. He scares me.
Serena: He raised Chuck, that scares me.
Gossip Girl: This just in - we hear there's a cold war brewing between Lonely Boy and a certain blue blood. We never thought we'd say this ourselves...
Serena: There you are. What's going on?
Dan: I'll tell you what's going on. I just became your escort to the ball.
Gossip Girl: ... But our money's on Brooklyn for the win!
