2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 18: "And The One Night Stand" Quotes
Caroline: I got to see my father, and he saw me.
Max: And I got to see Irish. I think he might be the one that got away, or the one that got put-a-way.
I guess I am your BFF.. Broke Friend Forever.
Max
There's only one party worse than this one. The Donner party.... And they had better food.
Sophie
Sophie: Max, I know you had limited budget, but music is free.
Max: Yeah, well I'm a douche.
Caroline: Pinky swear? Wait, never mind, I don't know where your hands have been.
Oleg: I just told you where they've been.
Webmaster: I can be done in a minute.
Max: Yeah, not want you want to hear.
Sophie: Do you want me to wait to give you and Caroline a ride back to our building?
Max: No it's ok, we still have to clean up and take the garbage out
Sophie: [Oleg struts in] Looks like the garbage is taking itself out.
Caroline: It's strictly business.
Max: Alright, but it's costing us 200 dollars, might as well get something out of it. Maybe let him browse your Yahoo.
Han: Tomorrow is Caroline's birthday.
Max: Why don't I know that about her? She tells me everything. I know so much about her cycle I feel pressure to impregnate her.
Oleg: I can do that for you.