I understand now what it's like have too much on your plate. Between my medical practice and this job, I'm being pulled in a bunch of different directions.

Dr. Leo Spaceman

My lab work is in the field of sleep research, mostly because I checked the wrong box on a form once.

Dr. Leo Spaceman

[on his sleep study] It's being funded by the U.S. military and the WNBA.

Dr. Leo Spaceman

[on plan to get off jury duty] "I've got my Princess Leia outfit and my copies of Playgirl magazines from the early '80s."

Liz

[as Princess Leia] I really don't think it's fair for me to be on a jury since I'm a hologram.

Liz

Shut up, Lutz!

Liz

If you have enough money you can do whatever you want! Now I can appear on Martha Stewart Live. Oh, and it's going to be raunchy!

Tracy

[to Jenna] Wake up motherf****r!"

Tracy

[to Jack] It has a ham button! You used my idea!

Liz

Are you pickling squirrel meat? Cause I can lend you my skullpresser.

Kenneth

Jack: (re: his years spent developing the pocket microwave): Most of that time has been spent trying to come up with a hip, edgy name that would appeal to the marketing holy trinity: college students, the morbidly obese, and homosexuals.

With no TGS I see you... self-publishing your novel and moving back in with your parents.

Jack

30 Rock Season 3 Episode 14 Quotes

You know what I like to do for eight hours? The TV Guide crossword.

Dr. Leo Spaceman

Passing out and cursing on St. Patrick's Day. Is nothing sacred anymore?

Jack