Billie: I got to go meet my sister at a bar a few blocks away.
Sully: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Can I walk you there?
Billie: You don't have to do that.
Sully: Oh, come on! What kind of guy would I be if I didn't walk a hot pregnant woman to a bar?

There's all kinds of weird fetishes, like people are into weird costumes or... feet or... monogamy.

James

Billie: Sully just asked me out. Is it possible that at this stage of my girth where my skin is stretched to the point that it may never snap back that someone could find me attractive?
James: Yeah, it's possible.
Billie: Hah! Thank you.
James: If he's a freak!

Nick: We're going to be parents... eventually.
Abby: Well, eventually, I'm going to be infertile.
Nick: Are we really doing this I-wanna-have-a-baby thing again over eggs Benedict?
Abby: I think doing it over eggs is completely appropriate! Because every month, I make one, you do nothing about it, and it dies.

After two mimosas, [my husband]'s open-minded. After three, he blacks out.

Abby

Billie: So I met this cute, funny guy. And even if I'm so gigantic I can't even see if I need a bikini wax... I think he was flirting with me.
Abby: Of course, he was. We're the Chase sisters. People chase us.

Sully: Congratulations to you and your husband.
Billie: Oh, nope. No husband. No boyfriend. No contraception!

Zack: Best friends are like Supreme Court appointments. You can't lose that job until you retire or die.
Davis: Sweet, man. A job you can't get fired from. That is tailor-made for moi

James: I've got two simple rules that I live by: keep all my blood inside my body and have as many orgasms as possible. And anyone who's doing anything else is doing it wrong

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