Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXFavorite Archer Quotes
I don't wanna read about Kenny Loggins. I wanna read about K-LOG!
Kenny Loggins
Kenny Loggins: You think K-Log needs to pay for sex, do ya?
Archer: No...but that being said, I do think he needs to re-evaluate this whole "K-Log" thing.
Malory: So this whole thing was just a sham?
Krieger: Well, if by sham you mean...sham...
You're important to me, so I made Woodhouse get it from Mother's storage unit...because I own him!
Lana: It's from a song?
Archer: Yes it's from a song! Recorded by Grammy winner and possible Faustian bargain maker Kenny goddamn Loggins!
Lana: I want this baby!
Malory: Well, sure, now. Wait until you're waist deep in diapers, he's up with the croup and there's no bourbon in the house. Then fast forward to him knocking up the au pair, flunking out of college, and then single-handedly bankrupting your drug cartel!
I mean, did you used to be a man?
Malory
So if you'll hide your vaginas, it's time to gather some intel.
It's not like we're selling cocaine to little kids!
Ray
Ray: We blew up an oil pipeline.
Cyril: Not to mention a bunch of...people. Compared to that, this is kind of a victimless crime. If it even is a crime. I mean, is it?
Archer:...he said, sucking at being a lawyer.
I always worried I would die without knowing how it felt to get my throat slashed and my tongue yanked out through the gaping hole.
The only limit is your imagination! Pew-Pew!
