Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXFavorite Archer Quotes
Malory: This is why I can't have nice things
Archer: Why, because you shoot them?
Archer: You've been lying to me my entire life. Just for once I want you to tell me the truth.
Malory: Well, people in hell want ice water.
Malory: But they were blanks, weren't they?
Archer: Uhhh, only if the back of his skull picked that exact moment to explode outwards.
Archer: You want me to take a baby to a murder?
Malory: Wherever, just out of here. I have no more love to give today.
Archer: What is it, like 2:30?
Cheryl: It tastes worse than it smells!
Pam: Man, if I had a nickel for every time I heard a guy say that, i'd have eight nickels!
Cyril: I'm coming as fast as I can!
Archer: Guys, we really need to talk about getting "phrasing" back in the rotation.
The mochachino ones are the cutest. And I guess he'd be half gay too. Can you say, "best dancer ever!?"
Pam
Archer: Woodhouse! What are you doing?
Woodhouse: Uh, sitting down sir.
Archer: What, at the table? Like people?
Lana: I find your lack of faith disturbing.
Cyril: I find your mannish hands disturbing.
Pam: I find them kind of sexy.
Pam: Come on Ms. Archer! You've been in there ten hours, meet us half way and Krieger will let you out of there.
Krieger: Or else he'll crank up the heat again.
Cheryl: I love... that you know how to do that.
Krieger: And I love that I have an erection, that didn't involve homeless people.
Lana: Is that a friggin' candy bar?
Archer: Yeah, but do you think you need the calories?
Caterer: Gravlax?
Lana: Thanks, no. I'm allergic to cat piss.
