Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Thursdays 8:00 PM on NBCBrooklyn Nine-Nine Quotes
Holt: Care to sit? I'm sure you'd like to take some weight off your cloven hooves.
Wuntch: Calling me the devil? How original.
Holt: Actually I was calling you a goat. You goat.
Now get me Madeline! And a bucket of water. It's time to melt a witch.
Holt
I'll distract the file clerk. Apparently he's really into bird-watching, so talking to a woman should blow his mind. And talking to this woman? It could kill him.
Gina
Amy: What do you have to do?
Jake: (dejected) Don Johnson it.
Charles: (excited) Don Johnson it!
Holt: Are you with me?
Terry: Oh hell yeah!
Gina: I'm turning my phone on to airplane mode.
Terry: Oh my gosh, she doesn't even do that on airplanes!
Madeleine's not some invincible succubus. She's a regular succubus and she can be defeated.
Holt
Jake: You remember when you told me that you didn't want to date cops? (bad Jamaican accent) Dat really bum me out, mon!"
Amy: Jamaican?
Jake: Yeah, that was a bad choice, I'm much better at German.
Okay, look, the reason I didn't want to work with you...can I do this in an accent so that I can undercut some of the awkwardness I'm feeling?
Jake
Goodbye, beautiful machine. Thank you for your service.
Jake
That machine's been here forever, it's basically part of the force. Take Scully instead.
Jake
Jake: This machine was the best restaurant in Brooklyn, and it always had a table for me.
Rosa: I knew just where to punch it to get free food, now I have to go back to punching Hitchcock.
Before I came to the 99, I was rotting away at a desk in the Public Relations department. All I wanted was a chance to do good police work again, I just got it, and I blew it, thinking about that devil toad. I'm tired of politics. Let's get that punk!
Holt
