Californication

Sundays 10:30 PM on Showtime
Californication
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Movie Karen: Why does he love her so much? I mean what is it about her?
Hank: I don't know. I don't think I've ever known. I think sometimes you get it right the first time and then it defines your life. It becomes who you are.

You know what I think Dad? I think it's all going to be OK. Chapters end. Sometime you gotta shake things up.

Becca

Hank: You're clearly the better man.
Ben: Yeah Hank? Like that was ever up for debate buddy.

Stinky snatch! P.U.!

Eddie

Ugh this is so boring! I wish we were at the kid's table and you were finger banging me underneath it.

Peggy

Well listen we don't need to work this out today Karen, but I would like to pick your brain and I do think you should consider opening yourself up to me sexually. Are you spoken for?

Eddie

Sasha: Once you fucked my mother my vagina pretty much sealed right up.
Hank: So you're like a Barbi now?

Peggy: I was just telling him I started my period and that my cherry poppin' daddy needs to earn his red wings.
Hank: Oh boy, this planet that you're from? How far from the sun we talking?
Peggy: Excuse fellas, this dirty little girl scout needs to plug herself up. Don't worry Charlie, I'll let you pull the string.

Karen: And the judge? Did you sleep with the judge too?
Hank: No, no, just a little oral and some anal. Its hard to get the robe up.

Karen: Oh my god, nothing changes! You got off so fucking lucky today and are still behaving like a bratty child.
Hank: Right...thank you for reeling me in. Let's hug it out. Celebrate my good fortune?

Wow you move fast. Or is this how you are paying off your bill?

Karen

Oh never have I been so excited to write a huge check and service the community for twelve days.

Hank
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 13 in total

Californication Season 4 Episode 12 Quotes

Oh never have I been so excited to write a huge check and service the community for twelve days.

Hank

You have been found guilty of statutory rape, but the real crime here is not one of moral turpitude. Your true crime is that you seem committed to squandering your natural gifts and wasting what appears to be a rewarding life.

Judge
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