I didn't think more than one person would answer the ad. Yes, dream coming true!


I say things others won't. That has value.


Holy macaroni with pepper jack.


I will find a loophole...then I'll kill you.


It's called a beer bong. You're not supposed to inhale, though — I almost died outside.


Before I respond to that, I'll have to take an extra-strength vitamin duh."


It's like prom queen! You wear a sash, and there's a vote, and if you win, they put a crown on your head, and I'm so jealous, Britta, I want to murder you! Aren't you excited?


Troy: I think I got half of it, which got me through the half I didn't.
Abed: Like the first season of The Wire.

Did the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants poison each other's food so they were too sick to leave? No. I've never seen it, but I'm pretty sure they mailed each other pants!


Someone make her a dude, so I can punch her.


Why's she teaching Spanish if she's a doctor? Go cure something.


Dean Pelton: Word of advice: If an Asian man says he's a Spanish teacher, it's not racist to ask for proof.

Community Season 1 Quotes

Professor Whitman: A little trick for achieving the proper competitive mindset: I always envision my opponent having aggressive sex with my mother

Abed: I hate when they finish each other's...
Troy:... pies.