Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBS
Cougar-town

I don't want to do anything anymore. I don't want to eat, shower, or put on sunscreen. I mean, ultimately, I put on sunscreen. I have to. I'm a pale weirdo.

Travis

If someone was up on my man like that. I would lace up my ass kicking boots.

Laurie

Ellie: If I get murdered I need you to tell the police something.
Laurie: Seriously, if I had a dime.

Ellie: You know if they just wanted to see some dumb, townie ho floppin' her ta-tas all they need to do is stay here and give ten dollars to-
Laurie: Yeah, yeah, yeah I know where you're goin' with this.
Ellie: Let me finish. You.

Grayson: You're not my Mom.
Jules: Don't sass me! I am not in the mood.

Jules: So you're telling me that you didn't wear kneepads because the other guys were making fun of you?
Grayson: And because I'm not a baby.

This is my fault. I should have written a note by the phone that says "Bobby, do not answer my phone." Oh, I was wrong here it is.

Jules

He's like a newborn calf on wheels.

Jules

Forget for one second that if you let one Torres into your home every second and third cousin on the Eastern Seaboard will drop by to say hi.

Ellie

Ellie: Eat your chips, Jellybean.
Laurie: I don't wanna.
Ellie. Play with the bag.

When Smith dumped me. It literally took me months to get back to a place where I could sleep with random dudes to feel good about myself.

Laurie
Displaying all 11 quotes

Cougar Town Season 2 Episode 19 Quotes

Ellie: Eat your chips, Jellybean.
Laurie: I don't wanna.
Ellie. Play with the bag.

When Smith dumped me. It literally took me months to get back to a place where I could sleep with random dudes to feel good about myself.

Laurie
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