Desperate Housewives Season 3 Episode 13: "Come Play Wiz Me" Quotes
Alma: We should've kept trying. If we had a child, we'd still be together.
Orson: I know. That's why I stopped trying. Goodbye Alma.
Mike: Hey, Susan.
Susan: Hey, you're back.
Mike: Yeah, Zach Young posted my bail. But I'm guessing you had something to do with it.
Susan: Maybe a little.
Mike: Is there any way I can thank you for everything you've done?
Susan: Actually, yeah, there is.
Mike: Good, good, just tell me.
Susan: I can't see you anymore. I want you to understand it doesn't have anything to do with you, it's just-
Mike: (disheveled) That's okay, ahm, I think I get it. (They see Ian's car pulling up) Well, I must probably go.
Gabrielle: No, absolutely not.
Susan: Oh, come on! Mike needs a great lawyer, Zach can afford a great lawyer.
Gabrielle: I don't care. I'm not going out with Zach Young.
Susan: It's one little date.
Gabrielle: You wouldn't even let your own daughter go out with him. You said he was a psycho.
Susan: He's matured, to the tune of a billion dollars. Please do this, for Mike.
Gabrielle: Susan, do you know what your obsession with Mike has cost you? First you piss off Bree and then Ian, and now you're pimping me out to a teenager.
Susan: Okay, I deserve the pimping remark but let's not pretend that, you know, we're above teenagers.
Orson: I won't and you can't make me.
Alma: Can't? That drink I gave you had two kinds of pills in it -- one to put you to sleep and one to keep the part of you I need nice and perky.
Zach: But you said I could kiss you.
Gaby: Yes, my lips, not my esophagus!
Zach: For your information, I've been told I'm a very good kisser, all right?
Gaby: By who? By the same girl who taught you to use your tongue like a winshield wiper?
Paul: Zach is all I have left in the world. Through everything that's happened, I've never stopped loving him. Can you please get him to come down here to see me?
Mike: That's one hell of a favor. Man, you have some nerve.
Paul: I know, it's kind of what got me in here.
(to Zach) You just vacuumed my tonsils, I deserve to know where that mouth has been!
Gabrielle
(narrating) Yes, it can happen so quickly. Life as we know it can change in a blink of an eye. Unlikely friendships can blossom, important careers can be tossed aside, a long lost hope can be rekindled. Still, we should be grateful for whatever changes life throws at us. Because all too soon, the day will come when there are no changes left.
Mary Alice
Zach: Come on, let's go, let's party!
Gabrielle: Listen to me you pimply psychopath! You and I are never going to party! In fact, the only reason we ever gonna be in the same room again is if you strangle a cheerleader and I wind up on the jury!
(to Orson) I am not sleeping in a bed that had your dead mistress' teeth in it!
Bree
Gabrielle: You're pimping me out to a teenager!
Susan: Okay, I deserve the pimping remark but let's not pretend that, you know, we're above teenagers.
Hey... Looks like an interesting book. What's it about? (He grabs the book and throws it aside) Never mind. I'll wait for the movie!
</i> Mike
