Eli Stone

Eli Stone Quotes

Season 2 Episode 5: " The Humanitarian"

J.J.: I'm a swimmer. I don't put alcohol or drugs in my body.
Eli: Absolutely. I was a mathlete. We had a similar ethos.
 • Rating: Unrated

Frank: Be careful, Eli. Going against the visions.. .it's risky.
Eli: Yeah? Well, if God wanted a puppet for a prophet, he should've chosen an accountant.
 • Rating: Unrated

Keith: But I think it's best if we go with someone outside the office with this. So, uh, I'll give my old colleague Danny Meyer a call.
Patti: And this Danny character--where does he live?
Keith: I don't know. What's it matter?
Patti: I need to know I can track him down and kick him in the cojones if he messes this up.
Keith: And that's why I'm not the guy to help you with this.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: Posner & Klein can kiss my hundred-grand-a-week retainer ass!
Jordan: Whoa!
Eli: That's how we do things downtown! Sorry.
Jordan: Quite all right. If I were more prone to outbursts of emotions, I'd probably be doing a little jig.
Eli: That I would pay real money to see.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: As you pointed out, sir, some of our people are in contact with their people, so some cross-pollination is bound to occur.
Taylor: I'm not pollinating anything with Matt.
Eli: I didn't say you were. I was just trying to imply that you are pillow-talking our business plan with him.
Taylor: I am not the leak, Eli, and to prove it, I'm gonna found out who it is. Happy?
Eli: Ecstatic
Jordan: Your management skills are as deft as ever.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 2 Episode 4: "Should I Stay or Should I Go?"

Jordan: Eli, I understand you have a special affection for Ms. Dekker.
Eli: Why does everyone keep saying that?
Taylor: You're kidding, right?
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: Patti, you know that box you've been keeping for me with all the faxes and letters from potential clients?
Patti: You mean the wackadoo file?
Eli: I mean the box with all the fascinating complex legal dilemmas that could one day end up in the Supreme Court.
Patti: Well what I have is a box full of cases from the nutballs that saw you on the news--the wackadoo file?
Eli: Could I just have it?
 • Rating: Unrated

Taylor: He just needs a gentle push.
Eli: Well, he's your boyfriend, Taylor. Did you try the red nightie thing? That certainly convinced me to... uh, that's inappropriate. Noted.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: You're the best, Patti.
Patti: I assume that'll be reflected in my Christmas bonus?
 • Rating: Unrated

Patti: Can you believe how easily people are bought?
Eli: The exodus has begun.
Patti: Only the morally bankrupt and weak-minded. No one liked your wife's banana bread. We only ate it to be polite!
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 2 Episode 3: "Unwritten"

Maggie: There's nothing in this file that could me want to abandon my mentor.
Eli: Firstly, he's not your mentor. Secondly, I didn't abandon him, Taylor's handling it, and believe me, she's happier that I no longer am. And thirdly, I'm doing this with or without your help. And we both know that you're biologically incapable of turning down a poor sick kid case like this.
Maggie: I hate you.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: What? Oh, you've got vision fever.
Nathan: Huh. I must have missed that day at medical school.
Eli: You had a vision last week. You read a little bit of Dad's journal. It's all cool and exciting. You've got the prophet bug.
Nathan: Would you stop making up spiritual ailments, please?
 • Rating: Unrated

Matt: In court, you're is daughter, Taylor. And any argument you make to a judge is going to lose credibility because of that.
Taylor: You sound like Eli.
Matt: And if he and I actually agree, that should tell you something.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jordan: (to Eli and Taylor) Both of you, make your case in one sentence or less. Ladies and daughters first.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: Is everything okay, sir?
Jordan: No, Eli. My position as managing partner of my own firm is at stake, and it appears the attorneys I've chosen to defend me against allegations I'm suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder can't seem to agree on a time of day.
Taylor: It's 11:19.
Eli: Give or take few minutes.
 • Rating: Unrated

Season 2 Episode 2: "Grace"

Eli: Maggie, my co-workers already think I'm marble-deprived. I don't think that representing a dog on my first case back is going to change that perception.
 • Rating: Unrated

Patti: I'm sorry, Eli, but you cannot tell the people you work with that your life-threatening medical condition is back on an interoffice memo.
Eli: You're right. An e-mail would be faster.
 • Rating: Unrated

Patti: Are we suing Duke Ellington, Eli?
Eli: Probably not. He's dead.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: This wasn't like a regular vision, Frank. This was like someone spiked the vision punch.
 • Rating: Unrated

Eli: Three thousand? What, dollars?
Nate: American dollars.
Eli: You talking to me? 'Cause I can have you smited. I know people.
 • Rating: Unrated

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